If you ask divorced people if they regret their decision, often they respond that it was the best decision they could have made for themselves at the time. What they don’t tell you is how awful the entire experience can be on the body and mind. Very few people have a positive experience during the process, though it can happen. But even in the most amicable of breakups, there are still hurt feelings. Let’s discuss how divorce can affect you and how you can combat these secondary issues that can arise.
Finding Solace in a Bottle
Whether your vice is a big bottle of whiskey or a pill bottle, it often intensifies during times of increased stress. There are so many emotions and hurtful things said during the divorce process that we often look for an escape. While it’s not a good way to handle the events surrounding your divorce, if it happens, we want to encourage you to consider drug intervention programs, where trained counselors will happily help you process your emotions in a healthy and productive way.
If you were struggling through your marriage with anxiety, you will find it increases when you separate and go through a divorce. People are hurt and tend to say incredibly ugly things to one another. The person you once thought highly of, suddenly becomes vile and demands money for everything they ever did. If you find yourself struggling with anxiety, a therapist is a welcome addition to your support team. Your friends and family can only support you so much, having an unbiased 3rd party listen to your feelings can be a benefit to you and your mental health.
As we struggle with the emotions that accompany our divorce, often we end up not eating as often or struggling to find the will to eat at all. High stress often creates extra stomach acid that does not respond well to food in the system and causes us to not feel very hungry. This is normal but you should seek out a therapist or talk to your general practitioner about your weight loss and how to maintain a healthy diet during your divorce. A healthy diet is vital in keeping you on top of your daily life, handling your stress levels, and feeling good about yourself.
It’s very common for people to experience depression during a divorce. Even though divorce is very common these days, we still feel like failures if our marriage is not a successful one. Something like a “divorce recovery group,” that is full of peers going through the same experience is often very helpful to overcoming your feelings of failure.
It’s not uncommon for you to struggle with sleep during your divorce. Often when we lay down, the very first thing the brain wants to do is rehash what happened that day, or what happened 4 years ago, that caused you to want the divorce in the first place. Those thoughts we push aside all day will suddenly pop up when we go to sleep. One way to combat this is to keep a daily journal that you write in every day. Unload all your thoughts and let them go so you can rest easier. If you attempt that and still cannot get any sleep, consider speaking to your family doctor about other ways to relax in the evening.
Divorce is not easy for anyone and it would be foolish to assume that you are doing anything wrong in the process. We feel things for a reason. Do yourself a favor and get your support team in place. A good divorce lawyer, a support group, a therapist, and talking to your friends and family about all of your feelings will help you get through the hard times.